NO, I AM NOT BAD PERSON BECAUSE I WANT ONLY ONE CHILD

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having one child

Mum’s with only one kid faces this particular question most of the time, “When are you having another”. Such questions tend to throw mums off balance if they plan to have only one child. I am literally about to say something that might piss some people off, but in reality that will be the truth. Let’s face the fact for a second; having one is a lot easier for parents to take care of then two or more children. Most people think that having only one kid seems selfish but the truth is there is no right answer to the debate on having children.

one child

Parents who have one child tend to give their attention, time and all the necessary requirements. With that, they receive criticism from friends, neighbours, and strangers who have no qualms suggesting how to live their family life. Most likely these attacks will not stop until they have reached menopause or too old to have another or adopt one. This happens because most people are of the idea that lack of sibling means they will turn out to be selfish, or spoiled. Well, that’s not true. However, having one child gives more controlled environment and such family seems to be happier than those with more than one. Parents-to-one child family seems very peaceful, giving them more room to be attuned with the child’s emotional needs. Here are some stats which have shown that there are steady rise in one child family in most developed countries.

Susan Newman, a social psychologist in her book ‘Parenting an only child’, stated that the number of one child families is rising because

  • In this economic times, the cost of childcare is of most concern
  • Both parents are working and may find it difficult to take care of more than one child
  • 50% of families divorce before they have another child

New Pew Research Center discovered that women are now reluctant on giving birth; A decrease in birth rates were most experienced between 2007 (before the recession) and 2011 (the latest data available).

One child parents – are they really selfish?

Children without siblings are said to be lonely, bossy and spoiled but studies have shown that they are not different from their peers. It is up to parent to strenghten their child’s emotional inteligence, regardles if they have one or ten children. 65 percent of mothers with kids work to support their family. They find it stressful and difficult to work while raising their kids. The impact of losing your job to take care of your kids in these current economic times can be devastating and that tends to dissolve the idea of having more kids. It’s not selfish to choose to give birth to one child because of individual concerns like finances, health and jobs. That is being realistic.

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