How to discipline your children without feeling like a villain


As parents, it can be overwhelming to watch our kids crying their eyes out because they aren’t willing to do what we ask, or they are demanding us something that we simply can’t give them. Let’s say that sometimes, we may have the feeling that if we stand firm against their tantrums, they are going to hate us for the rest of our lives… Don’t worry! That’s not going to happen. When they grow up, they’ll understand that we had good reasons to scold them. But meanwhile, why don’t you take a look at these tips on how to discipline your children? Child discipline is something we could talk about for months..

How to discipline your children

discipline a child

No matter what, keep your voice down when you discipline your children

Let’s picture a really bad situation: you have just moved out. Everything around is a mess and you have to relocate the furniture, clean up old stuff and put the house in order. The only way in which you can do it quickly, is keeping your little ones busy. Giving them a piece of paper and some crayons, you say something like: “make some nice drawings and we’ll decorate your room with them”. It worked for me!

But, a few minutes later, you could notice that there’s too much silence – which is never good -, and that your kids aren’t where you left them. So yes, they are probably doing something you won’t like.

You find them in their room, where they have painted a huge “landscape” all along the walls. At this point, you’re really mad, and you may really feel like shouting, but remember that they didn’t intend to upset you. If you lose your temper when you discipline your children, it sure will make you feel guilty afterwards. So, first of all, count to ten and take a deep breath. Then, approach your kids and bend on your knees, so as to look them in the eyes. You need to show them in a calm way that you are truly upset by what they’ve done. They need to understand why they shouldn’t do it again. That is a great way to discipline your children.

Teach them with the example

Did you know that kids imitate what’s around them? They absorb everything like little sponges, which means that if you want them to behave in a certain way, they have to see it from you first. But let’s say that you’ve been asking your children to be polite, and then they watch a TV show where people yell at each other – what kind of message are they receiving?

I think the best way to prevent that your kids behave badly, is showing them what’s right and what’s wrong every day. You should explain to them that they should be respectful, regardless of what other people might do. Of course, there’ll be some yelling to deal with anyway, but they are children after all.

Make them responsible for their own duties

This point is the key to truly avoid scolding the children. If we want our kids to behave correctly, we should teach them what “correctly” means to us. Each person has different priorities to focus on. As parents, some of us may prefer their children to stay inside the house and remain clean, while other would rather their kids to play on the grass and dig holes on the ground. So, it’s up to us to teach the children what it means to behave well. Apart from that, it would also be good if we start, little by little, asking them to accomplish certain tasks, such as making their beds or picking up their toys. The sooner, the better. That way, we shouldn’t have a reason to scold them later on.

Finally, to reinforce the kid’s positive behaviour, it is always important to say compliments (whether they do everything we ask them or not). They may have days in which they are unwilling to cope with us, but nevertheless, it’s important to remind them that we are proud of them and that we love them no matter what. By using these simple tips you won’t need to discipline your children so often.

What methods do you use to discipline your children?

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  • Reply shelah August 12, 2015 at 3:55 pm

    You have some great advice for positive parenting. Thanks for sharing!

  • Reply Kristy as Giftie Etcetera August 12, 2015 at 6:51 pm

    A big part of it is to control what is in your control. Being calm is in your control. Taking away markers used to color the walls is in your control.

    How they act is not in your control, and no amount of getting upset will make it so!

  • Reply Amy @ Fearless Homemaker August 14, 2015 at 3:17 am

    These are some great tips! One of my biggest disciplining techniques is to explain WHY. Toddlers love to know why, and with my daughter, when I explain WHY she cannot do / have something, or WHY I would like her to do/have something, that always seems to make things easier. =)

  • Reply Everything Mummy August 18, 2015 at 8:25 pm

    fab tips the holidays have been a trying tome for me particularly last week when I was quite poorly but definitely trying to keep calm and not shout or they will only copy I also find distraction a good technique when you can see they are about to kick off – looking for the tell tell signs to avoid the problem in the first place. Thanks for linking up to #kidscorner

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